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by Randy OoneyMy Nickel’s Worth by Randy Ooney
Soup Bowl
Football season lasts nearly as long as a bowling season these days, but last week we put the season to rest with Super Bowl 44. I found myself early that Sunday wishing that Pittsburgh had made it back to this year’s extravaganza. No, I am not a huge Steeler fan, nor do I hate the Colts, but if Pittsburgh had made it, I would not have had to watch LaMarr Woodley and Hines Ward try to bowl in the Chris Paul Invitational PBA tournament. You would think Chris Paul would invite someone who had an idea how to bowl. It was as bad as watching Charles Barkley try to play golf.
I got over the disappointment of our purple gang not being there, but I was sort of rooting for the Colts because I thought the Saints game plan against the Vikings was to injure Favre and get him out of the game. They didn’t seem to put the hurt on Manning. Maybe it’s an offensive line thing.
Most of the pundits panned this year’s commercials. Past performances have raised our expectations, and maybe the ad gurus are trying too hard. But I think we have to raise a glass to the cameo appearances by Mike Ditka, Jim McMahon, and our own Brett Favre accepting the 2020 MVP award at age 50, and suggesting he might retire. The admen for Career Builders must have seen Borat, and decided that fat people walking around in underwear was funny. It might have worked if it was an ad for Jenny Craig. The Letterman, Leno, Oprah ad would have worked better if they had all been sitting on Conan O’Brien.
Budweiser always has a few winners for Super Bowl Sunday. My favorite was the bridge out which was rebuilt with thirsty townspeople. The pickup football game with Betty White was okay, and made even better by the appearance of Barney Miller’s Fish, Abe Vigoda. In past days of league bowling, you may have gotten a high five from your teammates if you posted a score or 230 or so. Now, it seems you get a hand slap by four teammates and two opponents for picking up a 4 pin. The ad from NCIS is promoting replacing the high five with the head slap. That’s a scary thought. We could all be leaving the bowling center each night with a concussion.
The half time show had highs and lows. The special effects of lighting, laser, and pyrotechnics rivaled an outdoor Phish concert. The Who have definitely become the What or the Where. I was hoping for a rendition of “I can see for Miles”, but obviously their miles are in the rear view mirror. “Pinball Wizard” didn’t get it for me, and I’m sure the younger crowd is searching their Harry Potter library to find out who or what that is. This year our government is hiring thousands of people whose job it will be to count the 300 million people in the United States. The task may take eight months or so. It took the Nielson media service company less than 24 hours to count the 116 million people who watched the annual football climax. Maybe the Fed should hire Nielson to take our census.
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