by Randy Ooney
My Nickel’s Worth by Randy Ooney
Valentine
Valentine’s Day was a feast of St. Valentine designated by the Catholic church until 1969. There are actually three St. Valentines, and little is known about their lives, so the Church removed them from the calendar. In 1929, an event occurred in Chicago that will always be known as the Valentine’s Day Massacre. Al Capone & company were feuding with Bugs Moran’s gang over territories for illegal liquor distribution. Seven members of Moran’s gang were set up and shot to death in a garage in Chicago. Back then, the Illinois legislature didn’t impeach evil doers, they just let them take care of each other.
When some of us think about Valentine, we may think of Alice Johnson, the best looking teacher on the TV series “Room 222”, played by Karen Valentine. I never had a teacher who looked like that. Baseball buffs will remember the antics of Bobby Valentine when he managed the Texas Rangers and later the New York Mets. Somehow his name didn’t fit his demeanor. I don’t think he received any of those perfumed scented heart shaped cards from umpires.
Florists would have you honor the day with a bouquet for your special someone. Wal-Mart, Target, or your corner drug store would prefer you give a card, candy, and a cute little teddy bear. Sears would probably prefer that you give your sweetheart a trash compactor. Not recommended here though. Think outside the box - How about a red bowling ball. You could etch a heart shape around the finger grips.
We are lucky this year that Valentine’s Day falls on a Sunday. If you are fortunate to have a job with Sundays off, you may spend the entire day with your special someone. I am double lucky since February 14, 2010 is also the start of the Spring Festival, known to us capitalists as Chinese New Year. I may be able to cover two holidays with one gift.
So if you have found a nice Valentine date on Ineedadateforvalentinesday.com, dress up, get her some flowers, and enjoy a romantic dinner and maybe a movie with that special someone. If you’ve already found your lifetime companion, and entered into matrimonial bliss, take your wife bowling.
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